The wall blocked the searing black smoke from breaking me down. It created a barricade from me and the fire. I could feel the heat, and see the flames destroying all in their path. Gratitude filled my heart, that God had put me on the flameless path, He had kept me from the indispensable and uncontainable fire that would have destroyed me. After a moment of watching the fire and feeling its heat, I turned my back on it. I tried to focus on walking away.. but it seemed that no matter where I walked.. I ended up right back in front of the fire. Why hadn't I let go of the flames, and the destruction that they created? Slowly I realized that I was trapped, the walls weren't around the fire, they were around me. I was alone, but safe, from the devastation that was on the other side of the wall. I followed the perimeter of the wall down over and over again... until I slowly fell to the ground and fell asleep..
Sometime later I woke up with a growing desire to find a way out of the containment of the walls. I realized that through it all.. that maybe that wasn't God's plan for me. Needlessly Silent, I prayed to the Father, asking for a definite goal. Quickly, I knew that I needed to jump.. and head straight into the burning flames.. I climbed the wall and looked down into the burning pandemonium. Hesitating slightly, I considered the fire, the heat and the strangling smoke... Was it all worth it? I knew the answer.. because the words were shockingly clear.. "Jump into the fire, and a path shall be prepared for you..."
Sometime later I woke up with a growing desire to find a way out of the containment of the walls. I realized that through it all.. that maybe that wasn't God's plan for me. Needlessly Silent, I prayed to the Father, asking for a definite goal. Quickly, I knew that I needed to jump.. and head straight into the burning flames.. I climbed the wall and looked down into the burning pandemonium. Hesitating slightly, I considered the fire, the heat and the strangling smoke... Was it all worth it? I knew the answer.. because the words were shockingly clear.. "Jump into the fire, and a path shall be prepared for you..."
I've picked up an old habit again.. writing. For a while I couldn't face the emotions inside of me, and I stopped writing. I'm sorry if this is crappy.. I posted the original one [which was just the first paragraph] on my blog on Myspace, and two of my friends thought that it was really good. I'm just going on what they said. Not that anyone will read this anyways, but I just thought that it would be a good idea to create a blog that I could just... write in. So that maybe with time, I could become a better writer.
If you've found your way to this, and have read the post, Thanks.
-Beth
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